It is important for parents and guardians to teach their children about body safety. These conversations can begin as early as 3 years old and should be reinforced over time just like lessons about water or road safety. A good time to introduce body safety is during bath time or on the way to see the doctor.
Teach your child the proper names for all their body parts. Children should feel as comfortable saying penis, vulva, vagina, or breast as they are saying elbow, mouth, or leg. If you are uncomfortable talking about private parts, your child will pick up on this. You don't want your child to feel ashamed or embarrassed about asking questions about their body or telling you if someone is touching them.
Teach your child simple, easy-to-follow body safety rules. For example, "Private parts are the parts of the body that are covered by a swimsuit. Nobody should ask to see or to touch your private parts. Nobody should ask you to look at or touch their private parts."
Teach your child that body safety is part of personal safety. For example, "You have to wear a helmet when you ride your bike. You have to put on your seat belt when you are in a car. You have to look both ways when you cross the street. Nobody can look at your private parts, touch your private parts, take pictures of your private parts, or ask you to touch their private parts." Make sure your child knows these personal safety rules follow them everywhere - at home, at a friend's house, at school, and in the community. Explain the exceptions: a parent or caregiver may help with bathing, and a doctor may examine them with a trusted adult present.
Teach your child that they are the boss of their body. Don't force your child to hug or kiss anyone they do not want to (even grandma). Offer alternatives, such as a high five or a wave. Reinforce that their body is their own and that they can protect it.
Teach your child to speak up if anyone breaks the body safety rules. Make sure your child knows they should say "NO," get away if they can, and tell you or another trusted adult if anyone breaks a body safety rule. They should keep telling people until they are safe. Reassure them that they won't be in trouble for speaking up, even if it is someone they or you love, trust, or care about.
Teach your child the difference between surprises and secrets. A surprise is something you keep quiet for a little while, and then everyone finds out and feels happy, like a birthday present. A secret is something you keep hidden forever. We don’t keep secrets, especially about body safety. You should tell if someone asks you to keep a secret about bodies, even if someone says they will get in trouble or that someone will get hurt.
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Guidance on what to do if your child tells you someone broke a body safety rule can be found here.